Happy Blogiversary TO.....

The Leaky Boob! It is a little late, but The Leaky Boob turned one recently. The leaky boob was an inspiration to me to start my own breastfeeding blog. While, I didn't start this blog in order to become like The Leaky Boob, it was an inspiration to me to go ahead and put myself out there when it came to my views on breastfeeding and parenting. That I had a right to my opinion, to want to share, support and educate.

My Little Biter

          When you ask a group of soon to be new mothers about their plans for breastfeeding, you will get a variety of answers, but one thing I have heard many times is that they plan to breastfeed...until the baby gets teeth. As if teeth and breastfeeding are mutually exclusive. Having teeth does not make it impossible to nurse, nor does it make breast milk less important, so why so many women believe that weaning when teeth come in is beyond me. I know most are nervous about biting. And I can tell you from my experience that biting while nursing not something I wish to happened again, but it is something that you can work through. 
          Peanut Boy started teething around Christmas time, and of course I was bombarded with comments about weaning him since he was going to have teeth. I didn't even consider it. I had made up my mind that I was going to continue nursing, even if he did bite me. Then he bit me. Now as you can imagine, this was a VERY unpleasant experience. One day we were nursing happily and all of the sudden he just chomps down on my very sensitive nipple and I yelp in pain. I had been given tons of advice about how to handle biting, but not much goes through your mind except to make it stop. So I pulled him off the breast and set him down and said "no biting". Then he screamed! He acted as if I had cause him some great pain, when it was him who had done the hurting! So I conceded and allowed him to nurse again, but again he bit me. This time I was finished! I put him down, told him no biting and we were done nursing. This time he just looked at me and smiled. I was so galled by that fact that he thought it was funny! The next time he wanted to nurse I was nervous and I told him no biting, then he latched and nursed nicely for a few minutes, and then he bit me again. This went on for about 2 weeks. Peanut boy bit me almost every time he nursed. I was at a loss about how to get him to stop. Every time he bit, I would end the nursing session and most of the time he would protest loudly and cry as if he was in pain, or he would look at me and smile. Because he was not nursing during the day as much as he should, we were nursing almost ALL night! This was making me insane, and I had not a clue about how to stop it.
          I continued with my routine of warning him not to bite before we nursed, then stopping when he did bite. Then one day he just didn't bite. It was as if he had FINALLY learned that biting equals no more milk! I was elated, but skeptical. It has been more than 2 weeks since the last time he really bit me. The moral of my little story is that biting does not have to mean the end of a nursing relationship. While it is not something I would like to go through again, it was not enough to make me stop nursing. Children are smart and they learn quickly what behaviors will get them what they want/need. And it may have taken a couple weeks for Peanut Boy to catch on, but now we are happily nursing once again and cautiously expecting the next round of teeth, which may or may not lead to another battle with biting. But I am ready for it.


                 Stef

Guest Blogger Coming Soon

I am excited to have a new guest blogger coming to My Breast Thoughts. Stef from Real Life Mommyhood is a babywearing, breastfeeding mama who has gone through the biggest fear new nursing mothers have- a biting nursling- and she is STILL breastfeeding.
I am sad that Lil Man has weaned, but thankful that we had no "real" biting issues during our nursing relationship. He bit me once or twice, but nothing major, and prior to teeth....EXCEPT ONE TIME when he really clamped down. But that was it.
However, many moms really struggle with biting, and unfortunately, many mothers wean because of it. I am excited for her to come and share her experience- so be watching for her post, and in the mean time- go check out her blog.

Where Have I Been....

The family took a much needed vacation this last week. Well, kind of a vacation. Disney Daddy had to travel for work- and we tagged along, extended the time there, and made it a family vacation. We took Disney Daddy's niece, who we will call Smiles, and surprised her with DISNEYLAND!!!!! She was ecstatic.
This is part of the reason for the lack of posts.
Here is a picture with all of us and Pluto.

Lil Man was in LOVE with the characters- but ESPECIALLY Winnie the Pooh! He tried to climb into Pooh's arms. Luckily, the Disney Cast Member who offered to take our picture at Pooh's Corner saw this amazing moment and took plenty of pictures for us.


For those who don't know, I do a little photography on the side. I love being able to capture memories for others. Having Lil Man has changed how I take pictures. When you have a child this young there is no "posing" for pictures. It has taught me to capture the moments of every day life. I love this view through my lens.

Because of this, I am going to adopt a ritual from The Leaky Boob, who adopted it from Soule Mama. It is called In This Moment. A single picture- no words...although, I like words and will probably put a caption of some sort to remember place and time. I will normally do this on Friday, but I wanted to share this picture of Disney Daddy and Lil Man on Newport Beach last Monday.

In breastfeeding related news- I enjoyed walking around Disneyland, and I really enjoyed watching mothers with small children being nursed. I rarely saw children with bottles, and saw TONS being breastfed. Many moms used covers, a few did not. I just wanted to tell each of them good job!

The most exciting thing though, was meeting up with Wiski. Wiski has become a good online friend of mine, and it was wonderful to meet her in real life. Her daughter is only 3 day's older than Lil Man.  It was cute to see them play together. I would love to post a picture- and maybe I will- if Wiski gives her approval. I hope Wiski will be able to contribute to the blog again soon. If you missed Wiski's first post- check it out HERE. She is amazing and exclusively pumped for her first daughter.

Don't Label Me!

I recently have decided one of the biggest disservices we do to ourselves is labeling our style of parenting.
I was all happy, thinking I leaned towards the AP (attachment parenting) kind of parenting. I co-sleep, breastfed (until recently), baby-wear, do baby-led weaning/solids, do not use CIO, and more. I knew two of my choices were not in line with "that kind of parenting"- and they had to do with vaxing and circumcision.
Well, I recently was shocked when I read a comment somewhere. The discussion was regarding how to turn down toys you don't agree with. Original poster does not do plastic toys or trademarked toys in the home. Good for her! Plastic is for eco-friendly reasons, trademarked....well there are many reasons- money, etc.
I was shocked when several replies basically said ANYBODY who has even one plastic toy in their home is a "mainstream parent."
A mainstream parent is typically noted as someone who does not co-sleep, uses CIO, early solids- starting with baby food, circs, vaxes, and while they may breastfeed, they are typically considered "less passionate" about it. They prefer strollers and disposable diapers.
I never felt I fell into the "mainstream" category. Of course- I never felt like I was an actual AP parent either....yet, this discussion really got me thinking.
Is it not enough that we already label each other by how we feed our babies (see the part of my last post on why we should drop the labels of formula feeding and breastfeeding)? Suddenly we label how we parent...but on top of that if you are not 100% in one category then you are labeled as the other?
We parent. That is it. We parent the way that works out best for us and our children and our life. Natural Parenting, Attachment Parenting, Mainstream Parenting, whatever you want to call it- it is parenting.
I must admit- the conversation under this post left me unsettled. I didn't feel I wanted to be a part of this community anymore...because I don't fit the description that those moms have decided is an "AP parent" and yet, I don't want to be categorized as "mainstream."
The labels we place on parenting lead to negative views. When people think of AP parents, they imagine hippies bedsharing with their 17 year old son, homeschooling their children, teaching them how "the man" is doing them wrong....but what of my AP parent friends who move their child to their own bed at 12-18 months, are military families, and send their children to a community school, yet they wear their children, eat organic, delay vax, cloth diaper, and remove as many toxins from their home as possible?
So, I find that the AP parents don't want to claim me because of a handful of parenting choices I have made, and the mainstreamers don't want to claim me because of another handful of choices. Each labels me as the other, and disregards anything I may have to say about parenting because I am not in their "category" of parenting....

So here I am- stuck in the middle. The middle isn't so bad. I get to see both sides of every argument. I get to remember that if I choose the right topic, I can agree with any mother on her choices for parenting. Yeah, the middle is not such a bad place. You can agree with me, disagree with me...but please- Don't label me!

Remaining Passionate and Supportive After Weaning

I want to start off by apologizing for the lack of posts recently. My personal life has kept me quite busy recently. I hope to pick back up on posting some now that Lil Man is sleeping better! HOORAY!

I have finally come to peace with the fact that Lil Man is weaned. However, a friend (and I use that term loosely) made the comment "I am glad you weaned because now you won't share breastfeeding stuff on facebook."
WRONG!!!!
Just because I am not currently breastfeeding does not mean I will not remain passionate about it. It does not mean I will no longer lend support to those who are breastfeeding and could use some help. Breastfeeding is still a passion of mine. I will ALWAYS encourage mothers to breastfeed, support them in their journey, and try to put a realistic perception to breastfeeding.
I have been moved recently that two different friends have come to me recently. Both were not able to breastfeed for very long due to medical issues that interfered with the breastfeeding relationship during the critical first months. However, both are currently supporting friends or family to breastfeed, or pump, and give that benefit to their babies. They truly are amazing women!
This is how it should be. Those who formula feed, combo feed, wean early, and such should be able to know where to get information, and encourage breastfeeding mothers. Those who breastfeed should be able to lean on ANY MOTHER for support. They should not have to seek out only those who have breastfed.
When those who choose to use formula are not supportive and encouraging of breastfeeding, it is the exact same thing as breastfeeders who tear down formula feeding mothers. We need to just be supportive of each other, accept each others choices, and do anything we can to help mothers achieve their choice.
Some ways that those of us who have weaned or gone to formula may discourage breastfeeding moms without realizing it our making comments like

• I weaned my daughter and she started sleeping through the night. (Formula feeding does not guarantee a child will sleep through the night.)
• Now that I use formula, I can have a day away from the baby. (Which a breastfeeding mom can do by pumping, or even supplementing)
• Since I formula feed, I can feed my baby anywhere. (So can a breastfeeding mother- without having to prepare a bottle)

If you have weaned- switching to formula- think about words that you choose. While you may not think the things you say are discouraging to breastfeeders, they often are...and they are often not completely true.

Some ways moms (no matter what substance you feed your child) can help encourage other moms are

• To be educated on both formula and breastmilk.
• Understand what the mother's choice is. Support it.
• Remember that breastfeeding mothers have hard days, don't do the standard "You have made it this far. That is good. It is okay to switch to formula" until the mother has clearly made up her mind. I am thankful that on some of my hardest days I had people encourage me to keep at it. Otherwise, I may never have made it past 3 months.
• Know where to get answers. Breastfeeding comes with a lot of questions and obstacles. There are great resources out there. A great online resource is http://www.kellymom.com/ 
• DO NOT tear down another mother- no matter what substance she feeds her child
• Talk openly about breastfeeding - even if YOU don't breastfeed
• Understand that it is natural for a child to nurse into toddlerhood and that being able to ask to nurse is no different than a baby saying "baba" for bottle
• Be understanding and supportive of a mother who chooses to wean (after she has decided), even if it is before a year. 
• Remember that we are all mothers. Support each other, even if you make different parenting choices.

It is time that we stop tearing each other down and we start supporting each other.

Disney Daddy- The Actavist

Well, Disney Daddy is somewhat a career student. He is currently working on his 2nd 4 year degree.

In his English Composition class, they had the assignment to pick a cause to write an argumentive/persuasive essay/letter about, but the teacher didn't want the same causes she gets over and over (gun control, legalizing marijuana, etc). She wanted them to think outside the box. Well, I am a little proud of Disney Daddy for picking something mos males would not. He chose Maternity Leave as a topic!  He is for paid maternity leave. It is amazing that 163 countries offer some form of paid maternity leave (this could be higher since this article was released), and yet the United States does not require any form of maternity leave....Sure, there is the FMLA (Family Medical Leave Act). However, small businesses are not required to follow this, and it is not required that it be paid. It also is only 12 weeks. Many countries allow mothers 6 months to one year of maternity leave.

      One point that Disney Daddy made in his paper- the effect the lack of maternity leave plays with breastfeeding, and thus health care. I was so proud of him! He pointed out the burden a breastfeeding mother has when returning to work...having to purchase a pump, bottles, storage bags, take breaks (unpaid) to pump, hope the care giver understands how to properly heat the breastmilk, hoping the child does not develop a bottle preference, and more.

      Of course, this was just one of his many points. He also explained financial burden, the bonding time needed, and so forth. But I was very proud that he included breastfeeding as one of his major points. GO DISNEY DADDY!

How Long Before Baby Gets Benefits From Breastfeeding

A few days ago, a friend on facebook, asked what people thought about colostrum products for infants. My reply: "Hmm...other than colostrum from breastfeeding, I have never given it much thought. Interesting." She asked what I meant- "colostrum from breastfeeding? If you breastfeed a baby gets colostrum?" WHAT A GREAT TEACHING MOMENT. I told her yes, it as the first substance a baby gets, while waiting for the milk to come in, and it is packed full of antibodies and nutrients. I linked a few sites for her. I believe this mom breastfed, but she didn't realize that colostrum was given to her children the first few days after birth!

It got me thinking- often times, a mother feels if she can't keep breastfeeding past X amount of time- then there are no benefits. EVEN LATCHING YOUR INFANT ON ONE TIME GIVES HIM/HER SOME OF TE BENEFITS OF BREASTFEEDING.

Here is a great article regarding the benefits given for the different lengths of time.

So, if you wee not able to breastfeed as long as you hoped, remember you still gave your baby a great gift. This is important for me. I had planned on nursing Lil Man until h self weaned- hopefully at least 18 months. That goal later became a year. Unfortunately, this last week, my son has fully weaned. I was still nursing at night, and he started mostly sleeping through the night. After five nights of not waking, he woke, needing something to eat. When I tried to get him to latch, he looked at me with an utterly confused face as to why I was sticking my breast in face.
I wish I had known when our last nursing session would have been. Maybe I would have cherished a little more instead of grumbling about how he was waking at 2 am, yet again.
I am proud of making it to 9 1/2 months. I am trying to not have regrets. I did the best I could with the knowledge I had. I am better prepared for my next child and hope that I will be able to breastfeed my next child as long as he or she wants.

Something To Think About

Can you imagine if cows were as hung up about nursing as some humans are?

Breastfeeding is natural.

Cows drink cow milk, horses drink horse milk

HUMAN BABIES ARE MADE TO DRINK HUMAN MILK!

Just Call Him-

Disney Daddy

Hubby said that no matter what the vote was- this was his favorite! Although- I did try and get him to go for Captain Obvious because he is always saying things that are very, well, obvious.

So, We now have Disney Daddy (my hubby) and Lil Man (my darling son).